Thursday, October 18, 2007

Oma-god, NE

The circumstances of life have left me in Omaha, Nebraska preparing to get married in 6 weeks and completely change my entire life for one other, albeit amazing, person. Not only marriage but I'm giving up the way of the automobile and taking up the way of the bicycle. Seems to be a fair trade, nothing is more than 10 miles from me, which means at most, 45 minutes to get there, and it would probably be 30 by car anyway. Not to mention I will have one less car payment, more exercise, and the freedom to not be tied down by one more piece of american materialism (but then again maybe i'll start worshiping the bike god, who knows.)

I have had the full range of emotions since sunday when I drove up here, from wanting to turn around in fayetteville, to being excited in KC, and everything in between those two extremes since I've been here. The most important thing in my life for so long has been my friends, and now that is no longer true. But if i'm (because i didn't capitalize the letter "i" in the previous "i'm" it underlines it in red telling me it is spelled wrong, that really bothers me, i want NO red lines in my typing damnit!) really honest with myself the most important thing has been me, and now that i'm going to be dying to myself daily my flesh isn't really happy. I have found Ben Folds to be quite calming and consoling during all of this. I believe that marriage will be the anvil on which my soul and life are forged into tools usable by the Father, in ways my current state can't be. I know it will be brutally hard, but also exceedingly beautiful in finish.

My love for all those I am now 10 hours from, I miss you hickory house and all the blessing, burgers, and beer that flowed forth from you.

I suspect in the coming months there will be much written here, but perhaps I will be silent and let the wind carry my thoughts to the moon.